Three ideas, two deeper dives, one action
There is a method to the madness; this week, I want to build it out with you
Today marks the 98th F&T newsletter, and, after nearly two years of writing them for you and to you and nearly always inspired by you, I think I have an idea of how to make them more focused and usable.
Freestyle benefits from parameters
Each week, what I hope makes reading these newsletters fun for you to read as they are for me to write is that, typically, I don’t know what we’ll end up with.
The time now is 18:34PST on Tuesday 18th November 2025 and I trust that in an amount of time, let’s say 60 minutes – despite the noise of the hostel going on around me, maybe because of the hostel around me – we’ll have an artisanally crafted article to reflect on.
Whether you’re a jazz musician or vocalist, athlete or actor, and/or appreciate what they do, you’ll recognise in a set, a solo, a goal or even just a sentence, the ability to improvise is usually grounded in an awareness of how the “rules” typically work. Further, the setting of the stage and the time-bound nature of our presence in or around it usually provide sufficient impetus for something to happen, regardless of quality…
And this is one issue I have with my own ability to freestyle: I’m intensely aware of how the quality of what you read might feel like it shifts from week to week regardless of whether I have fun putting it together.
I mean, hey, nobody’s asking me to write these; and yet, over 50 of you have read every single one of them since January 2023, and, because of you, I want to see if I can give you something more reliable than simply a weekly slice of thinking in whatever form it takes.
3, 2, 1
James Clear, the best-selling author of Atomic Habits, has a weekly newsletter centred on this structure. And Chris Williamson, the super-successful podcaster from Stockton, the next town over from mine growing up, splits his newsletter up into three too.
I prefer the flow of the latter but appreciate the dependability of the former. I’m telling you this to give you both inbox inspiration and to acknowledge the people I look up to in this space I enjoy participating in as a reader and a writer.
18:49, 15 minutes down, 45 to go.
How we’ll build on what came before
Three ideas or questions, two deeper dives, one action.
Three questions
Are things worth less deserving of being worse treated?
Are you sad or simply less happy?
Which timezone works best for you?
Two thoughts furthered
Although 2 reared its head again today as one of my mates described “feeling depressed” following an amazing couple of days they’d had hiking, I’d like to bring you into two thoughts I’ve had and deeply felt this week.
Are things “worth less” deserving of worse treatment?
I’m into my fifth week of travel now – four done in Mexico, weeks five and six in the States – and I’ve stayed in 10 or so different accommodations now with my first hotel room lined up for Thursday in Monterey, California, (which I’m kinda excited about following what I’m about to type).
Hostels in America so far are more expensive than in most of Mexico. We could justify some of this cost as a traveller with thoughts like: they’re often bigger, the air conditioning feels a bit more effective, they often include breakfast. And yet, in America, as in Mexico, as in Southeast Asia last year, I wonder if there’s something about paying less than you would for a hotel and paying “too much” for a hostel that makes people act like dicks in them.
Wherever I’ve been, at least once a week, between the hours of 1am and 5:30am, times most of us would fairly consider “sleep time”, people have turned the big room light on and then acted as if they were at home or at least in a room of their own.
But I don’t get it.
Like, do they act like this because other people have woken them up and so that’s just what you do? Or because they think they could sleep through it? Or because they’re simply cunts?
Is it a case of, well, I’ll never see them again, so it doesn’t matter?
Even then, we know how rough we feel after one bad night’s sleep, but when it’s two or three or more in a row, the deleterious effects on our health and mood only intensify…and we don’t need studies for this, we’ve all felt this, right? So why would anyone want to inflict this one someone else?
Some of the best sleeps I’ve had have been in hostels
Something I’ve noticed in the States: when you pay for fewer beds, fewer people will be in your room – I promise you that statement is more meaningful than it first appears:
So, in my hostels so far, a bed in an 8-bed dorm has typically cost $35, whereas a bed in a six-bed dorm has cost $37. And yet, when I’ve checked in, the most people I’ve had in a room with me has been 3, while the 8-bed dorms have supposedly been fully-booked up.
So, if you want to reduce the likelihood of cunts while balancing your budget – six weeks to six months of travel for me at this point of my life necessitates more hostels than hotels – shoot for shared rooms with fewer people in and you might just find there’ll be even fewer people in there. Where I can’t stretch to $20 extra every night for a private room, $2 extra most nights to improve my odds of a good night’s sleep is definitely worth it for me.
Which timezone works best for you? How did you find out?
19:27 and they’re belting the out of tune piano next to me…
I’ve struggled to work this week – as a coach, friend, son and podcaster.
I’m eight hours behind most of the people waiting on me for replies, and by the time I get close to replying, it’s 17:00 in the UK.
If I’m lucky, I’ll get some asynchronous chat in the same day but, for the most part I’ve been intensely aware of the “I just missed you” feeling.
In Southeast Asia, I had something similar but in the other direction – at times eight hours ahead of my clients, friends and family. I liked the feeling of having had most of my day done and then having something to talk about but I can’t currently see myself in, say, Indonesia, full-time. The food, the language gap and the perennial heat are three reasons currently for why.
On the other hand, I’ve really enjoyed the flow of Mexico, specifically Mexico City, where I was six hours behind for most of the time, and could see myself in that environment, with the climate and the language and the food being three major draws.
I’d not expected to enjoy California as much as I have – and this includes driving an unnecessarily large car! – but the relative expense of everything, the time difference and the need to drive everywhere haven’t offset the natural landscapes or the warmth of the locals or convinced me that this is my little corner of the earth, yet.
19:36 let’s wrap it with an action and some photos…
Could you make someone’s day better…or at least not make it worse?
You might be travelling, they might be travelling, you might see them every day; it might be a text to say I’m thinking of you, it might be a voicenote and a silly joke, it could even be offering to pick something up for them; whatever you choose to do, it might not seem like much, but, just based on the frustrations I’ve felt this week solo moving about the place, I assure you it could more than brighten their day, and I’d love to hear what you chose to do if you do!
And that’s it from me!
From here, I’m hoping to meet back up with the bride and groom in situ in their San Francisco home and record another episode or two of the podcast. As stated above, I’m currently finding this tough so hope you’ll bear with me for the last week and a bit of this generational trip.
Much love and I’ll see yas in the next one
J x
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It's not you, it's where you are, right?
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